It was a bright sunny day in Ojai, California.
I strolled through the town’s famous Sunday farmers market - filled with dreadlocks, mystical crystal, and of course, an abundant array of fruits and vegetables.
I crossed the street into a park nearby. A small group was gathered, and a man was speaking in a microphone about some flavor of Hindu spirituality.
A woman dressed in colorful Indian garb was sitting at a table nearby.
As I walked by, she gestured to me and handed me a book.
“Hello sir, how are you doing, are you interested in finding the meaning of life and discovering the secrets of the Universe….”
I’m perpetually interested in exploring different kinds of spirituality and religion, but my guard is always up in these situations.
It’s necessary to proceed with caution - knowing that there’s always a catch, and in a place like California… it might be a cult.
I chatted with her a bit and asked her about what they were doing. She gave me the stump speech and the hard sell.
“How will you ever find happiness in life if you are consumed by material things?
I told her that I had read Autobiography of a Yogi by Yogananda.
Oooh, Awkward…different sect of Hinduism. She changed the topic quickly.
And then she went for the jugular.
“Jeff, I want to ask you, deep down, who or what do you think you really are?”
Ooooh, tough question.
But fortunately, I came prepared.
Jewish, I said.
Ooooh, awkward again. She told me that wasn’t a good answer but stumbled, dodged, handed me a piece of fruit, and asked for a donation.
I happily sent a venmo, more than worth it for research purposes.
Consider how that interaction could have gone differently.
If she asked who are you really, and I didn’t have a good answer, she would push me into uncertainty, which of course means I would have to show up to their classes and maybe join their group if I want to find the answer.
It’s a discussion of leverage.
If I don’t know who I am, then someone else can use that to influence me.
I don’t actually know anything about this group (although just to be clear, I’m not joining).
I’m just saying - this is a very common recruitment tactic that all religions use.
And remember, complicated long winded answers will never work.
It has to be simple. And then they can’t say anything.
Identity is a very personal question, and everyone needs to find their own answers.
My journey has taught me that when push comes to shove, I’m Jewish. That’s who I’ve been, that who I am, and that’s who I’ll be - for the rest of my life.
Knowing this with complete certainty makes it a lot easier for me to explore other religions.
I’m open to learning from everyone, but point blank, I know what team I’m on and that will never change, regardless of what adventure or journey I’m on.
Lesson:
When it comes to identity, seek out simple, clear answers that feel intuitively correct.
Finding these answers earlier will prevent a lot of headaches down the road.